Welcome to Ten Days of Stealth Giftedness: A Crash Course on Incognito Intelligence

This is your guide to effectively hiding your giftedness from the world.

Kind of like being the James Bond or Jason Bourne of smart. Or both.

Like these boys.

Day 5:  Avoid the use of behemothic words.

One of the hallmark traits of gifted individuals is not autohagiography as many believe. Rather, it is the use of advanced language unassumingly.

Gifted kids use big words not to show off, but because those are the best words for the situation.

Many bletcherous textbooks are written without this in mind, and so the gifted child, reading them, may become prone to cachinnation.

The only defense against the pathetic nature of most of the language one encounters is the cacoethes to use awesomely humongous words because they are the perfect fit for the situation. Being forced to use teeny words just so people don’t discover your true identity is the wanweird of the stealth gifted.

So, there will be no lovely verbage, my friend.

No more trolling through the dictionary to soak up the beauty of your native tongue. No more sweetness of just the right word tripping off the tongue like a child with a jump rope… Indeed, you must use pedestrian language at all times, lest you are accused of using big words to “sound” smart (which begs the question, “What should a smart child sound like?”). So, think about using words with no more than three syllables (and use those sparingly). Short. Common. Boring. Indistinct. Non-specific. Welcome to their word, young Padowan. Just take care not to try this experiment too long, or you will get the mulligrubs.

autohagiography – speaking or writing in a smug fashion about one’s life/accomplishments

bletcherous – pertaining to something poorly or disgustingly designed

cachinnation – loud or hysterical laughter

cacoethes – bad habit or insatiable urge

wanweird – unhappy fate

mulligrubs – state of depression or low spirits